Wednesday, September 30, 2009

August 26th, Feeling Comfortable in my own Skin

Do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. Then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is-his good, pleasing and perfect will." - Romans 12:2
I decided to add onto this verse because ever since school started it has been in my mind constantly.
I am fed up of conforming to society's views on beauty.
I am utterly SICK of caking on makeup in order to feel beautiful. I am DONE with wearing a mask to school to make people like me. Yes folks, that means I have decided by the time this year has ended..I will no longer wear a trace of makeup to school. Now for those of you who know me, I used to be one of those girls who would sit in their desk before class doing their makeup. I used almost everything. You name it, i have probably used it. I am terribly ashamed that I feel I must cover up my entire face with makeup in order for people to notice's embarrassing. But I know I'm not the only girl suffering from this problem. Society these days is just setting up young girls for depression and eating disorders and feelings of ugliness.
ALMOST, keyword almost, every girl I've met has had some problem with their self esteem. These days, confidence is a rare thing. I want to change that. I'm sick of girls suffering from eating disorders. I'm sick of girls feeling that they aren't good enough for anything because they don't have perfect skin and hair. I hate the fact that girls have to spend hours getting ready to go to school. I absolutely despise the fact we have to skip meals and eat like rabbits to make us feel good. These days, we think the definition of BEAUTIFUL is skinny, no acne, perfect hair (no frizz), tanned skin, and not one ounce of fat on our bodies. We also seem to think that HOT is an antonym for beautiful. Since when?
The average teenage girl has probably picked up a fashion magazine and looked at the bone thin models saying "Oh i wish i could lose a few pounds! I would be so much more beautiful!" Since when has the number on the scale, the size of our jeans, and the number of calories we consume dictate whether we are truly beautiful?
As said in 1 Corinthians 6:19-20. God told us to respect our bodies, they are a gift. He doesn't make UGLY things..just beauty. I feel that real beauty is a person who is comfortable with their looks, and has an amazing personality to go along with it. When did it become the number on the scale?I'm ready for a change, so I'm first challenging myself. I will be down to the point of wearing NO makeup WHATSOEVER to school and in public and feel totally confident by the end ofjunior year. I know I can't go completely cold turkey the first day, so I will be slowly weaning myself off it, but I know I can do this. I want to totally transform myself, inside and out. I want to transform that scared girl into a strong, able, confident girl.I may be pushing my recovery to the limit, but if I start to slip back into old habits I know God will help me back up. I'm not alone anymore.

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